Coaching Cville

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2 Steps Forward, 2 Steps Back

The last few weeks have been emotionally challenging for so many in the world. We are living in the messy middle, and so much of it is beyond our control. But here’s the best part of feeling “stuck” - if we can take time to step back and listen, we will learn how to proceed with more precision and comfort and success with each attempt.

This isn’t the first time I’ve talked about the importance of flexing your resilience muscles. When we take action that is intended to move us forward and we are not making progress, that’s our cue to practice what I call the “Art of the Step Back”. Failure, my friends, is just data. Exercising that mental muscle to rebound from a failure is even more important than nailing that goal. Getting to the finish line in life requires dusting yourself off when you fall and reassessing your next steps.

I’ve been working with several clients this year on perfecting their version of the Step Back. In a nutshell, we are crafting a formal pause to reassess progress, energy, and process. For some, it is regimented and well-defined like a break in a Pomodoro session. For others, it is spontaneous. And again, it can change for some depending on the action, project, or goal at hand.

What you are looking for is a moment to reflect on where you are in that moment as it relates to your intentions for how you are spending your time at that moment. For example, one client of mine sets an alarm for StepBacks every hour to check in on mood, energy, focus, and accuracy of time estimation. They ask themselves questions like: “How close am I to my estimated schedule or task?” “Am I doing what I intended?” and “How would I rate my mood?” These questions help inform them of how close they are to achieving their goal that day and allow an earlier opportunity to adjust the timeline or take a bio-break to recharge.

For me, I use my paper planner as my trigger for my own Step-Backs. I tend to refer back to my calendar and task list 3-4 times each day - it typically looks something like this: first thing, mid-day, mid-afternoon, and end of the day. I’ve been doing this long enough that I know when I need to walk away to recenter. What my clients and I have learned over the last year is where our typical limits lie, and how many tasks we can conceivable complete in one day or one “sprint” of work. We have learned what typically derails us, and what also moves us forward. It is common to see increased stress and emotionally charged events on the list of things that derail a good workflow. Interruptions of all sorts can also be on that list - studies have shown that even a small interruption can impact productivity by as much as 20 minutes.

Finding what works for your brain is key to moving into action AND to getting back on target. Noise cancelling headphones, quiet or busy environments, specific music playlists or white noise, sleep quality, nutrition, the type of work space you choose, the time of day, and even the temperature of the room can play a role in creating the best environment for progress to happen.

And when it doesn’t, that is a great opportunity to “step back” and review your big-picture biological, environmental, and cognitive needs and any disruptors in your midst. Here are the most common themes and questions that I use or have seen my clients find value in during a stepback:

I invite you to try this purposeful pause in the near future. Perhaps these will inspire you to create some meaningful questions to ask yourself during a step-back?