Love Yourself

Love is in the air. Today let’s talk about loving yourself through self-care and self-soothing.

Loving yourself includes knowing how to care for your mental and physical needs adequately. Since stress is a part of life, you need a plan for coping effectively and a process to focus on health even when things are chaotic. Many people do not have the effective tools or self-awareness necessary to process, plan for, or even cope with stress. 

So how do we tackle stress and self-love when the world feels challenging or even chaotic? We keep coming back to the intentions and the actions that they inspire.

Self-care is the improvement or preservation of your mental and physical health. By that definition, the fact that you have washed your hands today is in the self-care lane. So what do you call something that doesn’t improve or preserve your health but does allow you to cope? These actions, like getting your nails done or having your favorite drink, are self-soothing.

The actions we take to self-soothe can be seen as a tool to use with self-care and but they are not always as instrumental to eliminating stress or furthering your health goals as self-care. Elements of self-care can be mundane- brushing your teeth, sleeping, and even scheduling doctor’s appointments may not be “sexy” but they are all integral to your health.

Having a grasp on methods that allow you to self-soothe while also planning for self-care is critical. So, when your list of to-dos is piling up.. you’re over-worked.. over-stimulated, or… just over it, it may be easy to think about your manicure or a drink when you should consider methods to reduce the stimuli, set boundaries for your time, and preserve yourself. Think about the benefit of your actions - that manicure may keep you from biting your nails. Planning your meals may keep you from eating too much fast food. That drink might be better replaced by an outing with friends or better yet walk with one of those friends. We are talking about actively managing the most important human resource – YOU! 

When we make the time to properly care for ourselves, we have more energy to manage the road hazards that come our way. The most basic of needs such as proper nutrition, rest, grooming, and moving our bodies can set us up for a more rested brain, a more able body, and a more emotionally ready self. Some brains have a harder time maintaining these categories of self-care. 

Goal persistence can be a key executive function to staying the course. Brainstorm ways that you can better tackle these types of tasks and stick to something like a morning or bedtime ritual. What would help you stay accountable? Remember to remember? Track your progress. BONUS: Brainstorming can be a group effort. Sometimes it is more fun to have a partner in this exercise. Who might you invite to this exercise?

Remember, taking care of yourself is not a crime. It is a necessity. The most common complaint I hear is that “there just isn’t enough time in my day”. Just as we are intentional with all of the obligations that we have for work and to others, we need to set intentional and schedule time to take care of ourselves. If there truly is not enough time in the day, then something needs to give if you intend to keep going. You need fuel in order to keep moving forward. We don’t get very far when we are running on empty. How will you refuel your tank?

If you are looking for ways to introduce a little self-care, you may want to check out the blog on SMART Breaks and how to utilize them. https://www.coachingcville.com/blog/2020/7/15/smart-breaks